Stuffography Assa

Medium

Асса

Assa

1986


Review

by Dji & Dzhon

Brilliant. Has an odd sound to it sometimes, but the album's appeal grows and grows and grows. Buy a prison slang dictionary to fully appreciate "Mochalkin Blues" (my dictionary also has groovy drawings of prison tatoos). Although the film features versions of Akvarium songs sung by the film's male lead, the soundtrack uses new versions performed by Akvarium & Boris. Plus, the album also contains the hard-to-find Bravo song "Чудесная Страна" ("Wonderful Country"), the best available version of Kino's "Перемен" ("Change"), a killer song about the Soviet Air Force "ВВС" ("VVS," an abbreviation for abbreviation for "военно-воздушные силы"), and the endearingly kooky "Здравствуй Мальчик Банананí" ("Hello, Banana Boy"). Oh—and, as bonus tracks, the CD also has two of the movie versions of the BG songs, including the "компьютер японский Ямаха" version of "Иду на ты?" ("Breaking the Ice"). Sing it with someone you love.


For those wondering what a "Mochalka" might be, Dzhon, our man in the field, provides an excerpt from The Field Guide to Russian Fauna for this important word:

Mochalka (Femina Russkae Strashnovatae):

General Appearance: Kate Moss, if Kate Moss had big boobs. Big hair, tormented and teased a la Pugachova, dyed some color not found in nature (often Electric Platinum). Permanent sour-pickle scowl tatooed on face. Plucked eyebrows. Favors ostentatious shades of lipstick like pumpkin-orange or mauve.

Raiment: Easy to spot in winter turning blue at tram stops with the hip-length fur-coat and stockinged-leg combo. In summer favors pudenda-length skirts and tube tops or lace-up bustiers. Always to be found tottering along in something of the "platformy shoes" family: high-heels, platform sneakers, spike-heeled knee-high zapogi or even ultra-thick flip-flops.

Habitat: Dim and dingy Russian bars and cafes. In fine weather can often be observed parading up and down, down and up, up and down, the main street of any given city (Nevskii prospekt in Piter, Tverskaya in Moscow, Pokrovka in Nizhny Novgorod, etc.) Usually observed in herds of two to four specimens.

Typical Behavior: Standing in the middle of a Russian bar gently swaying to the beat of some Popsa abomination, hugging herself, holding a drink in one hand.

Extreme behavior: Cornering one in the back-bedroom at some party and (while a fellow Mochalka guards the door) literally throwing herself at one with the memorable line "I want to eat you." Mochalki of this sub-type were the marketable commodity behind Moscow's notorious Hungry Duck.