Songs Breaking the Ice

Иду на ты

Written by

В моем поле зренья появляется новый объект
В моем поле зренья появляется новый объект
Иду на вы. Иду на вы. Иду на вы.
Возможно ты шкаф
(Нет)
Возможно ты стол
(Нет)
Каков твой номер
(Шесть)
Каков твой пол
(Женский)
Иду на ты. Иду на ты. Иду на ты.
(Иди)

В нашем поле зренья появляется новый объект
В нашем поле зренья появляется новый объект Идем на ты. Идем на ты. Идем на ты.

Notes

Иду на ты...a tricky little notion to translate into English.

The Graveyard of Rejected Translations:

I'm Getting More Familiar

Let's Switch to "Ty"

I Go Onto the Thou

Will We Be Familiar?

I'm Going to Start Using the Intimate Russian Second Person Singular Pronoun With You Now (Hope You Don't Mind and Feel the Same)

Getting to Know You Better

I'm Going to Stop Being So Formal Now

Enough of This Pussy-footing Around, Let's Have Sex Even Though Your Boyfriend is a Bigtime Mobster

I'll Be Your Beanie Baby (TM) If You'll Be Mine!

Now, the real explanation
{provided by the ever-resourceful mimoza}

It's actually a pun on a famous utterance by Aleksandr Nevskiy [Prince of Novgorod 1236-52; Grand Prince of Vladimir 1252-63; Saint in the Orthodox calendar; bane of Germans and Swedes; blah blah blah. -ed.] who, before whomping pagan Lithuanian ass* or the like, used "Иду на ты" as his formal declaration of war.

This sounds so ridiculous—especially given the goofy flirtation-via-Casio-sound-effects context of иду на ты in АССА—that it absolutely has to be true.
* Disclaimer for Humor-challenged Lithuanians: The reference to "whomping pagan Lithuanian ass" is meant to represent the predilections and perspective of the aforementioned A. Nevskiy. It most emphatically does not exemplify the feelings toward Lithuanians of the Bodhisattvas of Babylon collectively or individually, nor of their heirs or assigns. Our true opinions are better represented in the form of a story about a heroic lightbulb whose life was cut short by tragic circumstances and of the number of Lithuanians who came to its rescue. Noble. Truly, truly noble.

Appears On

Assa